Maybe he approached you. Or maybe it just happened in the course of work, of being friendly, and the attraction grew, but you still knew he wasn’t free; he wasn’t available. You have stolen the time, energy, attention and protection of my husband.

What have I ever done to you that would make you think it’s OK to know me and yet have sex with my husband? Was I unpleasant to you, or do you have such little regard for a fellow human being that you gave no thought to the harm you were doing me? You give women a bad name; make us look weak and desperate, and make men feel they can do anything with us and to us. Divide and conquer: women won’t stick together so the men win. Win the right to sleep around, to tell you lies and keep you on the side with their wives.

Why would you lower yourself like that? He told you he loved you? He told me he loved me for 20-odd years. He kissed you? He’s been kissing me for ever, and up to yesterday. He told you he needed you? Well, he hasn’t told me that in a while, but he started out that way, every day for years.

So what happens when he doesn’t need you any more? Do you understand that if it wasn’t you, it would be someone else? It isn’t love. Even if our marriage were the most dysfunctional, it still doesn’t give you the right to step into the midst of it.

You should not be a part of our story, and for your own sense of self you should see that. You should have your own story. You should value yourself enough to want someone who is free because, make no mistake, even if my husband leaves me for you, he’s not free. I’m wrapped in his head, his mind, his thoughts and his spirit. I’ll always be a part of him, even if it’s a part he is trying to forget.

So what is it that makes you disloyal to your own kind? Why have you chosen to become the worst sort of woman there is … the other woman? How can you lie on my sheets surrounded by my perfume? How can you sleep with him, knowing he’s sleeping with me? Men couldn’t cheat if there was no one to cheat with. His wife